"We used to talk over the internet and he ended up sexually assaulting me in his car," said the Peel high school student, who was 12 when the incident occurred. "I thought nothing would ever happen to me. People are naive and really, really gullible at that age."
The girl was one of several speakers at the third annual Chill ‘N’ Learn conference for youth, held at the HJA Brown Education Centre in Mississauga. This year’s conference focused on youth and the internet — its abuse and safety.
On the surface, the girl looks like any teen you'd find at the mall — rosy cheeks, trendy clothes and stylish blonde hair.
But her story is anything but typical. Four years ago, she went through hell.
"It was the hardest thing I've ever went through. I went through a lot of pain with it," she said, breaking down and weeping on several occasions in front of the crowd of more than 200 students and school staffers.
"People aren't always who you think they are."
The teen said she had known her 19-year-old attacker through a family friend. One day, he popped up on her online instant messaging program and the two began "chatting" regularly.
She had told him where she was going to be one afternoon, and he showed up in his car. The girl was then assaulted.
"You have to take caution of who you talk to and what you tell them (over the internet)," she told the audience. "I never planned on meeting him. It wasn't like a planned meeting."
The girl kept the attack secret for about a year. But after "breaking down" at school, she said she "couldn't take it anymore" and told her parents what had happened.
"They were really confused," she said. "But family is family. They will always be there for you."
The teen went to counselling and received support from Victim Services of Peel and Peel Children's Aid Society.
Peel Regional Police arrested the man, who later pleaded guilty to the sexual assault. He was sentenced to house arrest.
The girl said her tragic tale should serve as a reminder to children and teens to be careful.
"I still use Facebook and MSN, but I'm a lot more cautious," she said. "If I don't know the person, I don't talk to them online."
She also told students not to lie about MSN chats with someone they believe could be a predator. They need to "come out" and tell their story, either to the authorities or to their parents.
"Honesty and integrity go a long way," she said.
Several in the crowd praised the teen for being strong and brave.
"You shouldn't refer to yourself as a victim. You are a survivor," said one woman.
Recent internet safety studies conducted by Mississauga-based Microsoft Canada and the Kids Help Phone revealed that many children are putting themselves in danger when communicating online. Children can easily fall victim to predators, the surveys found.
The 26-page Kids Help Phone report revealed 27 per cent of respondents had an internet relationship they kept secret from friends and family. About 40 per cent said they had given out personal information to someone they met online in order to prove that person was important to them.
lrosella@mississauga.net
